"Which part of all this... this nightmare did you believe? Whenyou started growing those big boobs or when you lost your cock?"I'd closed my eyes and seen again the accusing pencil strokes on thatpost-it note that came under the door in that awful white room where I'dlast been a man. 'We're going to make you understand what it is to beraped.'Nobody can ever know what rape really feels like until it's done tothem. It's easy to be dismissive about consent or 'leading-on' orinstinct or any of that internal justification shit when it isn'thappening to you.After my arrest, and didn't the media bastards love that, I'd beendismissive, dispassionate, scornful when the two detectives who'dinterviewed me had read aloud from the statement they'd taken from thegirl who'd claimed I'd raped her.Internal justification: she'd been a willing partner; she'd beendrinking and giving me the come-ons all night; she'd only cried rapenext morning when she'd told her slutty mate who she'd spent the. We had a happy loving marriage.Over the years the people that worked at SA had become a close knit group and everyone likes to socialize together. That is why in addition to the four parties that Mr. Stanley likes to hold there were a lot of parties at people's homes during the year. Sonya and I never missed a party and had held several of them at our house.About two weeks after this strange mood had come over Sonya we went to a party at Jim and Nora Carson's house. Most of the other guests arrived around the same time we did and I noticed the Sonya seemed to be in much better spirits as soon as we started circulating among our friends.We had been at the party about a half hour when another guest arrived. I had never seen him before and I am sure I would have remembered him if I had. He was just over six feet tall, in good physical shape and had a full head of dark brown hair. He looked to be about my age, around thirty-three, and I guess he would be considered handsome.As he entered.
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